"What horrifies me most is the idea of being useless: well-educated, brilliantly promising, and fading out into an indifferent middle age."
Sylvia Plath. (via bourbonandpearls)
I almost didn’t reblog this because my gut instinct was to hide from the truth of it.
I am surprised by how much sex I have had in my life that I didn’t want to have. Not exactly what’s considered “real” rape, or “date” rape, although it is a kind of rape of the spirit - a dishonest portrayal or distortion of my own desire in order to appease another person.
I said yes because I felt it was too much trouble to say no. I said yes because I didn’t want to have to defend my “no,” qualify it, justify it - deserve it. I said yes because I thought I was so ugly and fat that I should just take sex every time it was offered, because who knew when it would be offered again. I said yes to partners I never wanted in the first place, because to say no at any point after saying yes for so long would make our entire relationship a lie, so I had to keep saying yes in order to keep the “no” I felt a secret. That is such a messed-up way to live, such an awful way to love.
So these days, I say yes only when I mean yes. It does require some vigilance on my part to make sure I don’t just go on sexual automatic pilot and let people do whatever. It forces me to be really honest with myself and others. It makes me remember that loving myself is also about protecting myself and defending my own borders. I say yes to me."
Margaret Cho, “Yes Means Yes” (via thewastedgeneration)
This is the truest thing.
Seedless red grapes
Sometimes when I say “I’m okay”, what I really want is for someone to hold my hand, look me in the eyes and say “I know that you’re not okay, here is $1000.00”.
getting that second panel tattooed on my soul. i want to use it as a business card. i want to go back in time to when i was single and text that picture as a twat shot to every douchey dude i met (just every dude really). i want to eat it as a high fiber yet still slightly sweet breakfast cereal. i want to create a religion based on it and make daily sacrifices in its honor. i want to take this moment to express to you how very true that second panel is.
Emma Thompson about acting | BAFTA Life in Pictures (Nov. 24, 2013) (x)